You should see the other guy...

At least thats what I feel like saying when people look at my fat lip funny. Yes, yes, I have a fat lip. A fat, swollen, bloody (kind of) lip. Ok, so I really didn't get in a fight with anyone, although that would make for a much more interesting story. Real story: I had some oral surgery done earlier this week. Turns out I had a blocked salivary gland that was HUGE (like the size of a nickle, except much thicker), and a fatty tumor underneath my tounge.

So, I went into the oral surgeon on Monday expecting it to be a simple easy procedure. The dentist had assured me that it was really simple and easy, and I, like a fool, believed him. The oral surgeon did a quick examination of my mouth and felt up my lumps (oh does that sound dirty...not intentional at all) and quickly declared, "They will have to come out!" So, he lead me down the hall to what I guess was the "Make Sarah's Lip Puff Up and Hurt Like Hell Room." The nurse there then proceeded to take my blood pressure and hook me up to one of those finger pulse monitor thing, which was fun, because then I got to listen to exactly how nervous I was about the whole thing. She then swabbed some numbing goo that tasted like bubble gum on my lumps and pulled out a needle that looked like it should have been in some weird creepy torture room. I did not like that, and the heart monitor apparently didn't either. So, they injected a bunch of stuff into my mouth that made my tounge swell up and made me talk like I rode the short bus to school. (I'm special, mommy tells me so).

After waiting around for who knows how long for the anesthetic to kick in, the oral surgeon came into the room and dove for my face with a scalpel (ok maybe he didn't dive exactly..) Right before he started in, he told me "Umm..you might want to keep your eyes closed for this.." Which I interpreted to mean, "Umm..yeah, this is going to be really bloody and gross and I don't want to have to deal with a weak stomach when I'm trying to hack your mouth apart." So, I, like a smart girl, kept my eyes screwed shut as tight as I could. I like to think that I have a strong stomach, but I"m not sure I could handle watching blood from my mouth being splattered all over my face. Which it was.

I have to say that feeling the doctor cut these lumps out of my mouth was bad, but not the worst part of this whole experience. The worst parts (yes plural) came after the lumps were out. First were the stitches. I had no idea that they were putting in stitches. All I could feel them do is pull at these long stringy things that were coming from under my tounge. For all I knew they were pulling out a tounge tendon or something. That was way gross. Then, when they were stitching up my lip, the anesthetic wore off. That really hurt. Then they wanted to show me what, exactly, they had taken out of my mouth. That was really REALLY gross.

The very worst part though, came after I got home. I was making dinner for my parents that night. A really really good smelling roast chicken. And I couldn't eat any of it. Liquid diet for me. Granted the generic Vicadin that they perscribed for me knocked me out enough that I really wasn't that hungry. But the thing is, I still have a hard time eating solid foods and its four days afterwards. All I want is a cheeseburger people!

So anyways, that was my gross pointless story about why my lip looks like I"ve been in a fight with Brutus.

Not a whole lot else is happening that's too exciting right now. Umm..I hear from Marvin pretty much every day....That's about it.

Hope your lives are more exciting.