Shut UP shut up shut up...

Seriously. How did he get elected? What is with this ridiculous rhetoric??? The latest news story is that Bush is calling for more troops in Iraq, when everything I've heard recently is calling for a reduction of troops. The Iraq Study Group called for less troops. Even Donald "Germany thinks I'm a war criminal" Rumsfeld wanted to reduce the troops in Iraq. But, of course Dubbya wants to get into a gigantic pissing match. "We will win, no matter what." And then he pulls out the classic line of "...it's going to take a while for the ideology of liberty to triumph over the ideology of hate." What??? WHAT???? I'm sorry, but I just don't see how rhetoric like that can fool people. Ideology of liberty?? Is that what people really think we're spreading?? Ideology of hate??? I HATE that he thinks he can simplify things so easily like that. This is not a battle of ideas here. This is not a war of "liberty versus hate." In case we've forgotten this was a war for WMDS, and THEY'RE NOT THERE!!!! This is not a battle about terrorism. I'm not sure if we remember this now, but pretty sure that the terrorist we've been looking for is Osama, not Saddam. And where's Osama?? Why is no one concerned about him anymore??? Grrrr.....I just can't take this bull anymore.

On Iran's bizarre anti-holocaust conference

Well, I'm sure all of you have been reading with indignant outrage about the conference that Iranian president Amandinejad has been holding in Tehran. How dare he? Right? How dare he question something that has been ingrained in our history as the most defining tragedy of the 20th century? I mean, it would take a lunatic to question something that has so much empirical evidence backing it! Right? And to go so far as to invite all sorts of anti-Semites and bigots to his nation to participate in something as dignified as a conference about it??

But, here's the deal you guys. As much as I think Amandinejad is a nut, some of the policies of other countries have made this a much bigger deal than it could have been. In France, German and Austria (and I'm sure other nations) it is a crime to question the validity of the Holocaust. Now, I understand the reasoning for this. I understand that in Europe, WWII was a major trauma that many people are still recovering from. (As a quick aside, when I was in Germany, I heard stories of tensions still occuring between Germans and French, as well as stories of men who, as children were forced to be a part of Hitler's Youth). But, had these nations been willing to accept unpopular opinion as a part of free speech, Amandinejad wouldn't have nearly as much international press as he does right now. There would be no need for an international conference in Tehran about the Holocaust because these idealogical "criminals" would be allowed to voice their opinions in their own countries.

As ludicrious as claiming that the Holocaust didn't occur is, outlawing that kind of speech only gives fuel to people like Amandinejad. Now, he's drawing all sorts of international attention to himself. He's able to say to his fellow Arab states, "See? Look how anti-Israeli I am. Look, I'm even questioning their very reason for having an Israeli state!" He's able to say "Look how forward thinking I am! These so-called liberal-democratic states are outlawing freedom of speech, so I am allowing these free-thinkers to come speak in my country. I am giving them refuge from hypocracy!"

Yes, the Holocaust was an awful example of what humans are capable of. Yes, it is ridiculous to try to claim that it didn't happen. I visited Dachau. It was a moving, emotional, terrible place. BUT, there have been other, equally as atrocious crimes against humanity in the non-Western world that haven't gotten nearly as much attention. And outlawing dissenting voices about the Holocaust is doing nothing but fanning the flames.

Wake up indeed.

Some food for thought:

The average America uses as many resources as 2 Japanese or Spaniards, 3 Italians, 6 Mexicans, 13 Chinese, 31 Indians, 128 Bangladeshis, 307 Tanzanians, or 370 Ethiopians.

Americans also consume a total of 815 billion calories per day - about 200 billion calories more than is required, or enough to feed an additional 80 million people.

Welcome to the United States of Gluttony. I read these facts out of my biology textbook last night as I was studying for my final. Ironically (or maybe not so) as I was reading these facts, Wake Up by Rage Against the Machine was blaring in my ears. Wake-up indeed. All of the sudden the song ended, and for a brief moment, I heard "Silver Bells" playing over the intercom in Starbucks (Starbucks!! I'm so ashamed of myself) and I looked around at the people who were there. All buying 5 dollar coffees and shopping for expensive, meaningless gifts to throw at one another to celebrate the birth of a man who told us to feed the hungry, clothe the naked and shelter the homeless. And Silver Bells was lulling them all into a sense that this consumerism was in the spirit of such a holiday. And all of the sudden I felt incredibly depressed, because I realized that I'm one of them.

Let's end the charade!

Ok my fellow women, it is time to stop this insanity. It is time for us to end the years of discomfort and embarassment that we've all experienced, and it is time for all of us to come clean. So, in the name of all women, I'm going to be the first to admit it, in hopes of inspiring other women to liberate themselves as well. I admit it! I poop! And not dainty little rabbit turds either. I poop like a human being poops, and it's time for humankind to realize that ALL women poop.

There is a phenomenon that occurs in women's bathrooms, that I'm not sure men realize even exists. I've witnessed this phenomenon. I call it "the silent waiter." This is the woman who desperately needs to send the Browns to the Superbowl, but is so afraid of people finding out that she poops, that she'll sit and wait, silently, in the stall until no one else is in the public bathroom. I know that you other women know what I'm talking about. I'm sure that you've been a silent waiter at some point in your life. I know I have. But, let me ask: what's the point?? It's a bathroom! Isn't that what's supposed to be going on in there?? What's the hang-up?

We need to stop this myth of women being dainty and pretty little things who never do anything undignified. Women poop and fart damn it! And I'm not afraid to admit it! Well, actually I am. Just like every other women. In my friendships and relationships, the last barrier to be crossed is always the poop and fart barrier. I know I've got a friend for life once I can have the "poop talk" with him or her (Becky, Courtney, you guys know exactly what I'm talking about). I know that whatever romantic relationship I'm in is not just a short term thing once I don't have to run three rooms away whenever I have to fart. Do men go through this agony and discomfort about their bodily functions? I'm not sure they do.

So, my fellow pooping and farting women, lets end this cycle of embarassment and repression! Lets all just admit it! We poop! We fart! And it's ok!